haha xanga dies...

seems the rage at the moment, xanga, dieing...its that psychotic point of the semester where theres no time for anything, (from my situation, at least) and thats the main reason for non activity.  my grades are straight khara, so i'm buckling down to try and salvage a 3.0 for the semester, which will keep my gpa at about a 3.3.  lots of improvement needed in the next semester or 3.  General Ed classes should burn in hell.  A general education test should be given to determine one's well-roundedness before assignment of proper general education classes.  That would waste way less time no?  Speaking of time, californians get caught up in the 'not enough time for anything' rush.  I know, I do it too.  but its not too healthy, causes stress, and can cause many to overlook things to be grateful for.  But the time is flying indeed; age is setting in.  I feel old at 20.  guess i better get out there and be with as many natalie portman clones as i can >=) jk (not).  late.

w00 w00.

the eternal dillemna (college ver. 1.0),

So much school to worry about, not enough time to destroy the worry.  Studyin for a crucial organic chemistry exam that is on monday (asshole scheduled it right after easter, cancelling any desire to go home...).  That goes well, i should knock the shit out of this exam.  Then theres the biostat paper that i must finish...But on to more pertinent matters - social life.

Yeah, i realized today that i'm coming to this point where i can either break friendship with this good friend who is an ex due to the fact that it still hurts being her friend.  Now, if the reasoning for the break were solid, i.e., i screwed up, she screwed up, we argued too much, etc etc, i wouldn't have a problem and would've aready made the decision long ago.  But this is not the first time i've been put in the bullshit position of a bullshit breakup that wants to stay friendship.  I have a good mind to give her a piece of my mind if i do set the ultimatum, becuase she initiated the break, and is still desiring the closeness we once had.  I know what i have to do and i'm gonna do it....damn s.d. girls.....

oh yeah, happy easter!  i've been in a happy mood for the most part, except for this one little unhealing flesh wound in my side...Grr....shes a great girl too, i want her back actually, but whatever, normally i just need to go meet another girl whenever this happens, so i'm basically stating this to sort it out of my head and set myself straight, so to anyone reading, disregard any incoherence or assorted problems with this entry. 

Battling the threat of depression...

D.

weekends mustn't die so fast

...Had a pretty decent weekend with Steve and the gang, partied on friday, almost getting in a 5-on-5 brawl with some weak punkers who were drunk, but it didn't happen, goody.  Talked to some of the cuter opposite sex and met a few contacts for future followthroughs if i feel like it.  Saturday went to another party w/ the boyz and this time, it was straight 22-26 yr olds, but some were acting younger than some 17 yr olds i know -_- just goes to show.  Did some chemistry on a more academic note, studied and gym'ed to my heart's content.  Went to PB today (Pacific Beach) and ate dinner at Gringo's (LOL isn't there something unethical about that name?) and basically lived it up, meeting the cutest fake blonde ever named ..jacqueline? randombreezy? anyway, she was our waitress at this Gringos right off the beach, and one of the boyz knew her from high school.  I have been in a spontaneous mood lately, and she decided ot introduce herself to us, and i could'nt let such an oppertunity pass without attempting again.  She goes to USD (richgirl...damn...) and is from the I.E. just like me .  yeah, we'll see how that one unfolds, but for now, i dont care, the homie steve and his whole gang have the outlook that i have, and are extremists in the fact taht they go and get these bitches for the use that htey have primarily (to them), and that is sex.  Watch out S.D. we'll see if i decide to take such a path.  .  sleepytime, damn timechange, laters.

-D.

not a bad week....considering i just took 3 colossal tests and DONT think i did well on them...

But hey, now we have a break for Caesar Chavez day (???) in the middle of the week, and here i am, relaxin and about to hit the beach and see who's out n about. 

I actually saw a few movies yesterday/today, heres some concise reflections on them...first, lets tackle The Rock's new movie, Walking Tall.

Walking Tall is based off of a true story, and is pitted in the middle of some hicktown, where the Rock, aka Chris Vaughn returns from the military to his hometown, only to find that it isn't the hometown that he left.  Corruption has turned the town into a drug ridden, porn infested vegas of sorts, NOT the country hometown that Vaughn left.  So, Vaughn takes a stand against it.  The police force is corrupt, so he runs for sheriff during a trial in which he is the defendant (!!).  Vaughn then commences with 'making changes' and setting things right.  Overall, a good movie.  I left feeling like i should go the gym and try to be like the Rock. lol.  But seriously, the rock is becoming a decent actor, i definately recommend this movie, it is probably more worth the 10 dollar ticket than most of the movies in the box office today.  7.8 out of 10

The other movie happens to be 'Girl Next Door' starring elisha cuthbert.  If seeing Cuthbert in a hot red dress doesn't at least strike all hetero guys as an appeal to see the movie, the storyline can be vouched for.  The film consists of lots of humor and issues that all high school and college students can relate to.  The underlying theme to the movie actually has me believing that adult film stars have a heart as well, and can experience 'true love' while making love despite the suggestions of their occupation...Good movie.  A strong 7.6 out of 10 on my scale (which is known as quite cutthroat, so anything past a 6 is worth watching) and anyone who doesn't think cuthbert is drop-dead gorgeous is out of their mind, oh yeah, shes not a bad actress in this movie either .

enough for the movie reviews, i'm off to live it up on the shopping strip of PB.  Maybe i'll meet some cute ex porn star lol.  If anyone has time and wants to watch movies, see these, they're better than everything else out there at the moment.  Lates. 

D.

hmm......lotta stuff to say, no time to say it

the returning week to school, i arrive to find a test past on friday, and 3 on monday.  -_- 

While i juggle studying for biostats, physics, and econ, the stress is compounded by some extreme issues arising out of the brickworks from the original hometown homeboys.

Rather than narrate anything about it, the argument basically points out a few things to me: 

 1.  With my friends, i dont look behind the scenes or read between the lines, if there is something that i do that is somewhat or completely shady, LET ME KNOW, i promise that my closer friends i would die for, just illuminate the underlying shadiness and i'll take measures to fix it. 

2.  I think this phrase of 'bros before hoes' is true, and i live it to heart, but i did let myself get thrown for a loop with one particular, which i never let happen before, but i DID, badly, for a minute, and with only one girl.  but did i NOT realize and alter activities in order to be with the homeboys and shit?  yes i did, so, im not perfect, if you are, and you're on the planet earth, be my mentor i beg of you.  How many apologies can i give, even when many arent even necessary? 

3.  You wanna hit me over something i did/do?  You're a close friend?  DO SO!  HIT ME!!  Dont hold anything back, i can take a black eye or a bloody nose (hope u can too) and still be close friends afterward.  Break out the boxin gloves baby!  Sheesh...

4.  It was brought to my attention that i do and offer a grip to my friends that they may take for granted.  Really, its like some people dont realize how much mechanics charge these days, or how much the food and drink offered could be quickly resciended or even not offered at all, or how the laughter that we share mustn't be mutual or somethin.  No conceit or anything of the sort intended; I do have good points to being friended with ya?  I hope so, or if i were you, i'd not be friends with me! r-d-r-r...

but really, all those things that went thru my head and were pointed out on here should'nt have even arisen in my opinion.  I do tend to take everything my friends say without defending myself much, so there it went.

...As a S.D. homewarming gift, i get to biostat lab, and i had written a paper for the class.  I, hving friends that give me rides and stuff, hooked them up with the paper for REFERENCE, to use in writing their own paper...The stupid fucks photocopy the shit, not even changing the font.  -_-  This gets all of us no credit on the assignment, my 21/25 turned to a 0/25 and jeprodizing my grade in biostats.  The fool isn't even very sympathetic toward the incident, making for a more annoying situation.  I'm not hurt or anything regarding the situation, due to my new motto, "expect the worst.  that way everything is a pleasent suprise."  It's a good thing to live by, in this day and age, it has me laughing things off that i probably would have stressed on a couple of years ago...speaking of a couple of years, i feel old!  at a ripe, near-prime 20, the years are kind of flying by.  That is the most scary concept when thought of, but whatever, its no biggie, and i'm not that old anyway .

"expect the worst, that way everything else is a pleseant suprise"

-D.D. Alston